Parallel paths: Mother, son with autism learn to navigate world, strive to raise awareness

About 3 percent of Clark County residents, both children and adults, are autistic

By Brianna Murschel, Staff writer

November 13, 2025 8:04 am

Clark County, Health,

Robyn Kistemaker, left, plays with her daughter Noelle Hively, 5, at a Pray-Ground sensory activity area Sept. 8 at Messiah Lutheran Church. Kistemaker and David Hively moved from Michigan to Vancouver in August 2024 with their son, Lucas, and daughter, Noelle.

Robyn Kistemaker, from left, Noelle Hively, 5, Lucas Hively, 11, and David Hively sit for a portrait at Messiah Lutheran Church. They adopted Lucas in 2014 and Noelle in 2020. (Taylor Balkom/The Columbian)

Robyn Kistemaker, from left, plays with daughter Noelle Hively, 5, while dad David Hively, right, watches son Lucas Hively, 11, play with a toy from the Pray-Ground area Sept. 8 at Messiah Lutheran Church. Both parents are pastors there. “Living with folks who are autistic has its own challenges, and so sometimes Noelle ends up feeling like the oddball out, or I end up feeling like the oddball out,” David Hively said, “because these two are over here geeking out about sharks or rocks or something. And they’re just sharks, they’re just rocks, why are we so invested in this?” (Taylor Balkom/The Columbian)

Noelle Hively, 5, left, stretches out a star Sept. 8 at the Pray-Ground area of Messiah Lutheran Church. Sometimes, Noelle and dad David Hively will go and do things that may be loud and crowded, and mom and son will stay home. (Taylor Balkom/The Columbian)

A sign introduces the Pray-Ground activity area Sept. 8 at Messiah Lutheran Church. The Pray-Ground has sensory toys, a dedicated space for kids and families to be together during worship. (Taylor Balkom/The Columbian)

Lucas Hively, 11, looks over at his dad, David Hively, while playing with a toy Sept. 8 at Messiah Lutheran Church. Lucas and his mom, Robyn Kistemaker, have autism. When she gets upset, she shuts down. Kistemaker has shown Lucas what it is like for her when she gets overstimulated. Even though their reactions are opposite, they connected on a deeper level. (Photos by Taylor Balkom/The Columbian)

When Robyn Kistemaker’s son, Lucas, was in preschool, his teacher recommended screening him for autism after noticing certain behaviors, such as running away from the class or tearing up paper and tossing it in the air to watch it flutter down. Lucas’ evaluation led his mother to reflect on her own tendencies, so she made an appointment for herself.

“As we were getting him tested and evaluated, my husband and I kept looking at each other and going, ‘That would make so much sense,’ ” she said. “I had sensory things, and my own habits and needs.”

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